I once said to a car rental guy who told me I didn’t need to read it that if I didn’t need to read it, he didn’t need me to sign it. That shut him down with a quickness.

Perfect!

Mine was decent, but she was still stunned that I wanted to read the shit.

It’s the MOST annoying when other lawyers come at me with stuff like that. I want to say to them “if you want to half-ass your job all day, go ahead, but I plan on actually doing mine.” I don’t, because that’s not exactly fostering a positive work relationship, but I really really want to.

This is totally the right attitude to have. If they want you to sign something, they can sit there while you read it or provide it in advance. When I bought my house, I made them send over the closing documents ahead of time so I could read them before signing and my broker was stunned. She was like “no one reads…

Nothing will infuriate me more than another lawyer coming at me with the “just boilerplate” argument. Yes, it is “just boilerplate.” You know what else it is? LEGALLY BINDING, MOTHERFUCKER.

Not to mention the natural resources of those states, especially the oil and gas.

It looks like that’s what I’m going to end up doing, too. We’ll see.

I am trying to buy a Mini right now and I am bewildered at the lack of enthusiasm or follow through I’m seeing from the dealers in my area. Even when I made appointments, the salespeople were indifferent at best, and took days to follow up to requests for quotes. I thought I had one bought, but the sales manager…

It might be better to go to a school or class if that’s available to you. I took my nieces to MidOhio and the instructors had them driving pretty smoothly in a couple hours, and I didn’t have to risk my car to do it.

I’ve had to pull my manual into the mechanic’s bay on more than one occasion. And valet is a crapshoot.

A ha! That’s why I can’t relate — my phone charger is near the door, so once I plug it in at night I don’t notice the text alerts (mine is just sound, no buzz) from the other room.

I had an uncle like your dad who didn’t stop until I got fed up when I was 13 and bent his finger back (which was the same thing I’d do to my sister when she was annoying me). I got sent to my room, but I didn’t care because my uncle wasn’t in my room and the creeper kept a respectable distance after that.

Good for you. Just thinking about it makes me tired.

This makes me sad for you. Really.

Legit question, no snark: how do you find that kind of time? Twice a DAY? Jesus.

Calm down there, Macon.

Oh, eww! I don’t want to date an Island Boy!

Chi-town is never used, but every damn dude on every dating app in this town has some version of “Chi” and/or “fun” in his profile name. It’s psychotic.

See I hated The Blind Assassin and loved Alias Grace and Oryx and Crake. Atwood is crazy talented to be able to do all these different styles so well.