Good luck. I hope you can beat it quickly and with as little misery as possible.

Here's where call center experience is good. They teach you to hang up on people when you've done everything you can and you can't fix the issue. First, you say, "I'll pass your message on to so-and-so," because you can do that, through email or something. Do NOT say, "I'll have so-and-so call you," because you can't…

At least you don't live in Texas. In Texas, when it starts raining, traffic comes to an abrupt halt, because Texans are afraid their tires will get wet. Seriously, it's almost worse than driving on ice.

No, but it would turn them into martyrs, which we really don't want.

Dealbreaker. No discussion. Along with science deniers and conspiracy theorists. I can deal with people who don't share all of my opinions, but I cannot abide people who fall for that crap.

Wait, you don't want to die? Best skip Austin, then.

I predate the Trapper Keeper era, but I remember when status was determined by the amount of graffiti on one's denim-covered three-ring binder.

I know this one! Second Audio Program! Right? Did I get that one right?

Somehow I got stuck on his connection to Ferdinand and Isabella.

Spanish.

"Fritz East 25th Street." I don't think this will get me noticed by the porn producers.

NO!

I got halfway into this review before realizing I've seen it. It made zero impression on me.

I'm so glad they wrapped up the Mr. Green plot. I'm not sure I could have handled any more of the "Bateses in Peril" situations.

The progression is: 1. My Fat Saved My Life; 2. My 600-lb Life; 3. Skin Tight.

I like Family Guy, and I don't care who knows it.

You're right, "it's not like this is food or medicine." Instead of haranguing everyone who doesn't support the death penalty for piracy, "perhaps your righteous indignation would be better used on getting medical patents reformed."

That's a good idea. Then only one would have to be stored in the warehouse. Saves space.

The AV Club

Washington Post Style Invitational: