When my cousin Jodi was little, maybe three or four, she suddenly looked up from her toys as we sat playing and announced to the room, out of nowhere, “I didn’t pee in my pants!”

NO.

That was... something.

I happen to be SICK of it being “uncool” to dress appropriately for the cold. My skin doesn’t appreciate being assaulted by cold air, so I keep it all nicely insulated until the temperature outside becomes humane again.

Thank you for sharing this! Please, can you give us a link to someone actually singing the song? 

And why would you be proud enough to post a picture of it online? If I ever made food that came out that badly (never gonna happen), I’d make sure no one ever found out.

“before their is a replacement in place”

I can’t even tell you how much I love reading these each week. You give words to the feelings. I was absolutely seethe-vibrating by the time I got through your string of “stories.” Unlike our bloated leader, you really DO have All The Best Words.

So at least you know what I mean when I say that I love my VooPoo Drag and my Wismec Indestructible RDA!

Oh man. That’s nice. XD

Where there’s smock...

Ugh, embleer Frith...

Nice.

Lol... I was raised by a very conscientious grandfather with a septic tank. Scott brand tp only, and a box of Rid-X once a month. I’ve tried switching to the cushy stuff as an adult, and I just can’t. My butt demands what it’s accustomed to. :p

Oooh, good catch— I didn’t see her! The one I saw is more to the right of the pic, half-hidden behind someone who looks kind of like Paul Ryan.

I found one sort-of-brownish woman way back there...

I did not, but it helps that I happen to use Scott myself at home, and prefer it to all others.

It’s Monday morning and I only just got the chance to read this week’s Mailbag... My God, man, you’ve KILLED it with this one. Your words are FIRE.

God, it’s so ridiculously true. You can always tell exactly what shady thing they’re currently up to. Just look to see what they’re currently flail-screaming about “the libs” doing.

My apartment is above a business, and whenever it snows, the business owner ALWAYS busts out his leaf blower. He does all the sidewalks around his store, and then almost always takes a minute to do my car as well. He’s a nice dude. :)