+1

"who's that and where's my kid?"

Geez, take away Kristen Stewart and Taylor Lautner flips out

Constructive Criticism Can't Hurt DUAN:

"A Long List Of Sports Figures Who’ve Also Claimed Their Twitter Was Hacked"

Ted Danson ignited a firestorm over his appearance at a 1993 Friar's Club roast. He was blacked.

ChadHOchocinco

One For Later DUAN:

+100 dropped calls

"People don't be joking when they say the karaoke-king Serb performs on a sublime plain."

"My questions now is how many GWAR points does she get?"

Kat Von Dee: [cums]

I think the "this life isn't as great at outsiders think it seems" motif he spouts is complete bullshit and I'm not entirely sure he isn't lying in his rhymes, but he gets the best producers to work for him and he kills it.

Only got it cuz of JT referencing it on SNL.

+1 late-booked ticket to Hell.

You can, but they call it the Fanatec GT2.

Better yet, he should research the work of Silky Johnson, put some more water in his mother's bowl and come back fresh.

I read that as I skimmed his Wikipedia page trying to link him with some motivation to take a trip to Africa, it helped me realize just how funny-but-not-ha-ha-funny the world is.

The one time I was considered at-fault in a car accident.

And even with your comment - I can either try to attribute your entire second sentence to George Tiller as he attempts stand-up or to Nadia Suleman saying the kids won't help her be famous, but I can't make it work. I think my sense of humor's broken.