Sadly, as an arrogant white guy born into wealth, he will undoubtedly be given another chance. He'll have a half-hour show on Fox News before the week is out.

The next communications director will be "Kevin Bacon in Animal House", frantically screaming "ALL IS WELL!" as panicked crowds run amok and the smoke billows around him.

You can call it other things other places, but I'm confident within the confines of the AV Club, Rabin's My World of Flops will name this an unmitigated "Fiasco".

I just resent that parody for convincing me that rubbing Oreo filling on a cut of meat was a good idea. Ruined my Oreos and my roast.

Second-rate NKOTB song, though.

Wow, didn't realize until I looked it up (in relation to Harry Dean Stanton) that Shepard co-wrote Paris, Texas. Love that one.

I feel like "meatball historian" is the sort of job title I see in the Onion's American Voices section.

Too bad she wasn't in Ulee's Gold.

[Checks rear view mirror]

"Big fan of your work beating up that guy with no hands."

What you need to do is get Cheap Trick, Tom Petty, and Joan Jett to play one festival together, so you can guarantee ol' Diamond Joe Biden will take a road trip out there in his T-Bird.

The fact that diplodocus is long gone points in your favor.

Other than his every word and action over the last seventy years, what indication did they have?

Picasso's Guernica, at least until Franklin Sherman destroyed it.

I had mixed feelings, because the girl I had a crush on suggested we run away to Canada together if Gore lost. He did, but we didn't.

Yeah, by the time you're a doctor, your handwriting is much worse!

Our fifth grade teacher had us draft letters to the editor as an assignment, but I didn't realize she was going to send them in to the newspaper. I was a little taken aback when mine wound up getting published.

Yes, and it was delivered by a federal agent in a dark suit and sunglasses. In twenty years, kids in school will hear about how Robert Mueller's team was able to get Trump to surrender years of incriminating tax returns by simply asking "How much monny do you have?" after previous investigative efforts were stymied.

I misread it as Ty Burrell and the Muppets.

"This is excellent, far better than that Scottish place I breakfasted."