Congratulations! Such a joy to hear. 

Came for the cats, stayed for the relatable family bull shit. Hugs to you.

“I bring nothing to the table...”

Call me pedantic, but when I hear the phrase "trick to help you save money", I don't think "by not giving other people money" really counts. How about not going out to eat twice a week? JFC. 

Wouldn’t we all become unhealthy since we’re supposed to be eating a plant majority diet? So your enemies will get the last laugh when you die of heart disease.

I mean, snake ownership is very closely tied to the counterculture. 

Noooooope.

I have seen jokes before about how Paul Rudd is ageless, but holy shit, 2003 Paul Rudd literally looks younger than 2000 Paul Rudd. It makes me want to climb out of my swamp, hunt him down, and perch over his bed at night to hiss into his ear “Tell me your secretsssss.”

It's always such a great win when kitties don't hide. 

Glad you love your first tattoo! I have just one, and there are some definite regrets there. It’s on my back (wanted it on the back of my neck - regret #1), so I don’t have to look at it all the time, so maybe that’s why I don’t completely hate it? The negative experience was primarily my fault, anyway. It’s there, I…

I can't say that I have had this exact same experience, I just started therapy, long over due three weeks ago and for one of those weeks. my therapist was out of office. It sounds like you have tried to speak to your therapist and she just plied you with platitudes? If so, I would definitely walk away. You feel like…

It probably is! I find crushes tend to do that to many people.

My sincerest condolences to your friend. Losing a spouse is never easy, but I would imagine there would be a particular sting so soon into retirement.

Sounds like a great week! Did the vet recommend a food or is that something you're in charge of?

I love Bruce! He always looks sad and I just want to give him a hug.

He zoom!

Maybe it's just me, but I don't think you would have been able to convince me a whirlwind romance was a good idea at any age too much beyond 24. And that's after you ignore the fact that "whirlwind romance" is probably the nicest term for a season of The Bachelorette. 

“Her new personality will be.... pants!"

I feel like the town of Hillsboro hasn’t fully thought this through. You know what I would do if I was traveling along Highway 280 and saw this treasure? I would stop in Hillsboro. I would think “What a great place.” and immediately associate it with being safe. Perhaps falsely, but that’s what being made to think of…

How did he not notice the lack of "tingle" (more like burn)?