Or, depending on the guy, a super version of The Girl Next Door (basically Elizabeth Wakefield from the SVH series).

Everytime I hear anyone refer to women as females, I hear David Attenborough doing a voiceover while discussing the mating habits of lions, walruses, or some other animal.

Yep. I also do not have any fucks to give about what a guy thinks of my makeup. If I feel pretty, put together and confident....well, guys with opinions about my face, fuck all y'all.

True, but even so, I am a Paris with spots and dry skin and not a baby's butt smooth Rory. Less so now that I can afford decent skincare products, but still not a Rory.

This is what I thought of too. At the age those models are, I had skin issues (acne and eczema) and I did NOT wake up looking like them at any point in time. Ever.

I don't have a Twitter account at all because of the abuse so many users face, esp. female users being harassed into silence., but if the CEO is serious about removing abusive users, I will sign up so I can interact with the people I admire who are braving the trolls and abuse anyway.

This is exactly right (in my experience, anyway). The abusive jerks I've dated were not muscle-bound rage machines, their abuse was far more insidious. It's taken a long time and a A LOT of therapy to understand that all that bad shit was not me.

"Greene later clarified that he wasn't trying to "justify" sex with an unconscious person, calling it "abhorrent." But he still didn't like calling it rape "in every instance," he said, "dependent only upon the actor's knowledge that the individual is unconscious. That's the question. That's what I struggle with.""

My sister went through this too - fist fights in the school bathroom and recess yard, stealing, lying... my parents took all of us to family therapy and got my sister some of her own so she could say what she wanted without fear of getting in trouble. Turns out she was super pissed at my parents for never listening to…

I'm pretty sure my eyelashes are coated with Teflon because NOTHING sticks to them. I've tried dying them, I've used every mascara known to man...it all ends up pooling under my eyes.

Oh dear lord - I am now hearing ads on the radio for E.L. James approved naughty toys to spice things up in the bedroom. I'm all for sex toys (fun!), but I'm giggling at the idea of them being approved by the author.

A woman I used to work with always called people like this a "dinktoucher". I'm pretty sure this description fits Chip Wilson.

Same here - I did the same with the first Twilight film (the only one I bothered to watch).

I worked at a drive-thru only fast food place where it was not uncommon for staff to put scabs and/or loogies in a customer's food if said customer was being a total asshole.

Holy crap! I'm glad things turned out OK.

I ran into a barbed wire fence on a farm that hadn't been marked clearly when I was about 12 - I was running after a dog, he jumped through the gap between the wires, I ran into it and got tangled in it and it punctured my skin.

I wonder if you can purchase tube tops with sorority letters on them - a tube top is still a blouse, right?

The best part of reading this was that The Ride of the Valkyries started playing on my iPod mix one story in. Epic music for epic tales of shitting!

What a cunty response to some criticism.

I like crunchy peanut butter on hamburgers (along with bacon and cheese) - my husband introduced me to this, and it looks disgusting and gross, and people will judge you and question your IQ, but holy shit is it ever good.