I DON'T KNOW WHICH ONE TO SHOOT!

I just read his latest claptrap about his waning libido.

She got eyelash implants in Paraguay.

One in a million shot, doc!

THIGHS like WHAT WHAT WHAT?

SCRW FLANDRS SCRW FLANDRS SCRW FLANDRS SCRW FLANDRS SCRW FLANDRS SCRW FLANDRS SCRW FLANDRS SCRW FLANDRS SCRW FLANDRS SCRW FLANDRS SCRW FLANDRS SCRW FLANDRS SCRW FLANDRS SCRW FLANDRS SCRW FLANDRS SCRW FLANDRS SCRW FLANDRS SCRW FLANDRS SCRW FLANDRS SCRW FLANDRS SCRW FLANDRS SCRW FLANDRS SCRW FLANDRS SCRW FLANDRS SCRW…

The Dung Beetle

The hole cut into the bottom makes them ill-suited to the task.

Right, the same spiel as when they visit their grandparents.

There's too many whalers on the moon. They all carry harpoons.

Wait a minute… Penguins can't fly! PENGUINS CAN'T FLY!

#DonaldTriton2016

"It's after 6:00. What am I, a farmer?"

MST3K? Maybe it was too soon, but they would have had to cancel it eventually, or it would have gotten stale.

He still has his ways. One trick is to tell people stories that don't go anywhere. Like the time he caught the ferry over to Shelbyville. He needed a new heel for his shoe so he decided to go to Morganville, which is what they called Shelbyville in those days. So he tied an onion to his belt, which was the style at…

National Lampoon's Christmas Publication

(Should we tell him about the whole "he and his descendants to the 13th generation shall serve the dread legions of Hades for all eternity" thing?)

"Go ahead, fry my head!"

*years later*
"Is he Batman yet."
"He's working on getting his PhD in criminology. It shouldn't be too much longer."

Generalissimo Thomas Wayne is still dead.