I’m now imagining Luis’s patter moments being delivered by Nancy Brown and giggling incessantly.

Carmelo Anthony starring as “The Six Million Dollar J. R. Smith.”

This alternate universe theory also posits that stupid teams wouldn’t have been stupid, no? I mean, we’ve already established that offering to pay Timofey Mozgov is stupid; after that, we’re just dickering about price (as the joke goes).

Was there a time when Stephen A. wasn’t just Skip Bayless set to ‘11'?

Is it just me, or are they like mirror universe twins?

Only white MBA tall enough to appear in the picture.

Sadly, those are trilbies.

Bobby Hill with a fastball?

Draymond’s gonna wear it into the stadium the next time the Dubs play LeBron (wherever he winds up).

Next, we will learn that LeBron and Kawhi are scheduled to fall off the edge of Kyrie’s flat earth.

Wow. Bill Cosby has an account? Who knew?

Baseball math:

I wonder if that ball is still interred?

On the double kneecapping idea just don’t give the task to JR Smith because he’ll just take a lead pipe to LeBron’s patellas and say “I thought he wanted to retire.”

LeBron as Thanos would also explain how half of the Celtics roster was on injured reserve.

J. R. Smith smith’d all over the Cavs.

Go back to Tatum’s very first professional game against Philly in the Utah Summer League. Celtics down by one, he gets the ball on a midcourt inbound, dribbles to just inside the 3-point circle and buries a butter-smooth jumper for the winning points with like 1.2 seconds left. Not a desperation shot; not an…

Whereas I’m watching last night’s game and enjoying the defensive and lineup strategies. Wondering “Where the hell is Semi Ojeleye?” Only to find out afterwards that Ty Lue was asking the same thing too; so much so, that he forgot to put Kyle Korver into the game in the first quarter when everyone not named James or…

Your concern trolling for Jaylen Brown has been noted. Please move along.

Jaxson AND Taylor. What else would you expect?