Growing up, we lived minutes away from all my Father’s family. Now we live hours away from mine and my wife’s family. I wish I had realized how cool/nice/important having all those people that close was when I was younger.

This will make him an even bigger God to the Republican party.

That’s a lot of buttons considering the average age of a corvette owner is 61.

Are you a hot super-model? No, then leave your shoes on.

So now Lucas County Sheriff’s deputy Alan Gaston knows how the rest of us feel.

When my daughter was younger we used to base all time measurements on the number of Penguin of Madagascar episodes it would take. Saying 15/30/60 minutes meant nothing to her, but she could comprehend how long an episode was so we just used that as our metric.

Hold your head high, our concentration camps aren’t as bad as Nazi concentration camps. Have I got that right Chuck?

The plus side of MAGA/Trump is that it makes these cockroaches come out into the light so we can identify them.

Great idea, but the odds of me keeping track of the same tape measure for ~16 years is about zero.

One gets the feeling nowadays that if a cop removes his weapon from his holster, he’s going to empty the clip. It’s expected.

Back when a 4 function calculator cost $300, I took a 10th grade course on using a slide rule. 10 weeks spent learning how to extrapolate decimal points. Even then it was a waste of time considering how fast calculators dropped in costs. 2 years later, heading off to college, a scientific calculator was cheap enough…

My mother used to fold a paper towel a couple of times, wrap it around the oil bottle and then hold it in place with a rubber band. It tames the inevitable oil drips.

That is a great “are you f-in kidding me” picture.

2 weeks notice, that’s it. It’s the norm and if your company is one of those that walks you out the door as soon as they know you’re leaving (and that happens quite often) you’re only out 2 weeks pay. Consider how long of a notice a company would give you if they were terminating your position.

Watch the first few minutes of the film Selfless. At one point, rich guy Ben Kingsley heads home to his gold covered penthouse. The entire room is a hideous display of ostentatious and tasteless wealth. It looks like what a perpetually poor high school dropout would design if you suddenly gave them a billion dollars. G…

Wiseguy on Prime?!? I wonder how that’s going to look since it was probably shot on low-res videotape. But it’s well worth watching with its season long arcs - one with a new Kevin Spacey.

if you’re going to cut up your spaghetti into tiny pieces, maybe you should just start with another form of pasta?

I’ve been in a couple of those really lopsided split the bill situations and you really just need to stand your ground. Stand up, say the wife and I ate $20 with tip, put the 20 on the table and walk away. Only a group of assholes would insist you pay way beyond what you consumed. And in that case, you really don’t…

“You can’t harass our female employees, only we can harass our female employees.”

I have an Aldi and a Lidle near me and I find it amusing that pretty much the only name brand item you can find in either store is mayonnaise. Sure there’s a store brand there, but it’s right next to Helmans or Dukes.