An old friend of mine was/is a TSA agent at Logan airport and told me this:

Ah yes, this good mix of both we have here in the US which has left us with wage stagnation, exorbitant personal healthcare costs, massive wealth disparity, perpetual racial and gender inequality, 15% of people living in poverty, 70% of people with less than $1,000 in savings, the world’s largest prison population,…

“Calling him short is callow and unnecessary.”

Or the very worst.... Objectivists.

(not pictured: the phonebook Ben is standing on)

wait did u just quote ben shapiro unironically???

ben shapiro is a 5'4" manlet and he’s extremely embarrassed about that

are you offering to bankroll me in scandanavia for 6 months? because i’m definitely in

That’s just journalist Clark Kent. Is he some kind of hero? I’ve never thought his Planet stuff was particularly heroic, so unless he has some kind of secret identity that nobody has told me about, I don’t see what you are getting at.

I have no fucking clue what you’ve done here but I support it.

the only thing i care about in football is when the winning team lines up to gently kiss the tip of the president’s penis and receive a championship muffin

Los Angeles County (at 10+ million, the nation’ s most populous by far) is filled with people between 18 and 60 who left the very rust belt cities and states mentioned and never went back.

Bullshit. It’s a perfect metaphor for this country: Tom Brady is the walking embodiment of the concept of privilege. Screw the Pats and screw “positive person” Brady.

You root for some random ass teams.

Bernie would’ve won.

Rob Gronkowski has apparently also weighed in on the controversy for some reason. And he seems to be siding with Barkley. So I guess each of us has to decide where we stand regarding Bro vs. Wade.

the story is as good as winning the money,”

“Schneider was nominated for a 2000 Razzie Award for Worst Supporting Actor, but lost to Jar-Jar Binks.”—Roger Ebert

Travis Kelce does elaborate dances after touchdowns, makes jerking off motions toward refs on the field, gets a stupid unsportsmanlike conduct penalty after dropping an important pass in a playoff game, and has his own reality show in which women compete for the chance to date him. Yet somehow he doesn’t get half the…

What kind of monster plays backyard ball without his father