Or you can be passed over in favor of a white guy with absolutely no Middle Eastern ethnicity, who goes and does a worse job than you probably could have. Which is a double slap in the face.

"The most tyrannical of historical figures got sent through a wormhole into the future just before the Red Army surrounded Berlin. Now, he's living in modern-day Manhattan, putting away the war plans and trying his hand at his long-desired rapping career—all while looking for love in the big city. This fall on ABC,…

I want to see the sitcom depicting Hitler's rise to power from an obscure paper hanger, when he goes on tour through Europe during springtime, all while his fellow Germans are doing their fancy dances.

That's okay, we're not living in a part of the world where you could be shot for that. At least, I hope so.

"Indivisible?" I've got news for you, ABC: that which we call a shitty TV premise by any other name would seem as bad.

Judging from a recent interview, it apparently wasn't the creators' decision to end the show after such a long time. Which is pretty sad, but it certainly had a long go of it, and its legacy in the Adult Swim lineup is intact. (Started watching back in junior high, my goodness that's a long time.) There are far too…

Too many incredible moments to count. We'll miss you, Aqua Teen. But you will always be immortal in our eyes, since you came from the future to the past to rescue our present generation from the great Red Ape.

"Mr. Bulldops?"

Agreed. Or, like I always say, shum shum shlippidy dop.

I'm just treating him the same way that people treated me when I peed in my pants. Doesn't feel so good now, does it?

Season one was so original and mind-blowing, that pretty much every episode could be perfectly explainable as one's favorite. I guess the pilot is the weakest out of the bunch, although to me it has some pretty great moments in the R&M canon. The "I-i-it's got no charge left!" line from Rick always gets me, I guess…

I've tried, but he does it everywhere in the house. He told me he thinks about my friend Grace when he's doing it. It's so gross.

I've been wondering how his physical rehab is going. But if we really love him, shouldn't we leave him?

I told my teenage brother to quit it with the snake-makery, but he's still in his room and…well, let's just say he's ignoring me.

"Rixty Minutes" is still my favorite season one episode, but "Raising Gazorpazorp" is up there too. Especially with its commentary on parenting, and its depiction of the planet itself. "Also, is anyone cold in here, or is it just me?"

Forever and ever, 100 years Rick and Morty's things.

"Hey Damon, I'm really hating this season of 'Black Sails.' It sucks total donkey dick, and I'm gonna reach out to all my blogger and recapper friends and tell them to just hate-watch the shit out of it. Yeah, I know you have absolutely nothing to do with the show, but I just thought I'd let you know. All hail…

I thought Blim-Blam was out. No other Korblok to defend their rep?

Wasn't that Squanchy as the drummer for Rick and Birdperson's band?

"Heyyyyy
Take your pants off
It's schwifty time today!"