"You guys who got snubbed tonight, don't be sad! Be a pizza. Everyone loves pizza!"

Those leg organ black markets just get craftier and craftier.

DON'T SAY THAT YOU LICKED ME!

"When I sit and think about how painful life has gotten for folks here in South Dakota, I wonder if death wouldn't be the perfect release from this cold and meaningless void we call an existence. Crime, disease, poverty. Everyone's hungry, but nobody's eating. It can make a man feel…apoplectic."

"I'm aware of your condition
I don't mean for it to worsen
But I have something to tell you, sir:
We are the same person!"

Real good then!

Copy and paste this comment to five other pages or you'll die at 12:12 A.M.

Chocolate glaze is nice, but I prefer a good bear claw. Which reminds me: Go Bears!

Maybe it's just me, but for me, comparing social gatherings to thousands of people being tortured and killed comes off as pretty insensitive.

Aye, a good twynching will cheer up any man. Even Jesse Eisenberg.

Speaking of the Gilded Age, the best standards and practices story is when a show made Anthony Jeselnik change the punchline of a joke involving Asians from "own a laundromat" to something else. He picked "build a railroad" and they signed off on it, not knowing how much worse it was.

Your TV is a drunk Red Sox fan?

Since it's Spike, I'm expecting World War III to be between cool bros and chicks who don't want to flash their tits. Which would carry strong geopolitical implications.

That's six Oscar noms for him including "Crazy Heart," if I'm not mistaken. That has to be up there in terms of records.

Hmm, interesting. The man had to wait a long time before actually winning one. And I still haven't even seen "Crazy Heart."

"Hey, after a long day of political chaos you've gotta unwind, right?"

Pre-"Deer Hunter" Michael Cimino, eh? I've heard of it but never seen it. Might have to check it out. This day has been an onslaught of young Jeff Bridges material, I tell you.

Get down, it's Saturday night.

Oh I definitely knew that you were referring to the website, I just thought that you (like me) were extra excited with today's topic of conversation—and that it was because you were a boxing fan. My grandpa, before he fought in WWII, was a Golden Gloves boxer in the Bronx. Fought at lightweight, and was supposedly…

I love me some David Simon AND some Oscar Isaac, so it's gonna be double the excitement. Not sexual excitement, though. Well, maybe…