Deadspin: the Source Mutilator

I love Mass Effect....but I can't bring myself to try this out after that mess of an ending. Does that make me more jilted fanboy or cautious consumer? It's so very free.....

Bowser may be a bad father, but Mario's the monster breaking into vehicles and beating up children just to steal their wands.

Who the hell plays poker on the floor!?

I dunno, he's been the star of some pretty amazing movies. I certainly don't want ketchup as the featured part of any meal.

"Poynter will really have its hands full!"

Tyson skipping dinner before the Holyfield match.

"But it's a western TV show, so I guess it's amazing."

11.5 pounds heavier than his playing weight? That is one heavy ring!

The important question is, will the pigs be replaced with dogs for the Eagles version?

"The only way to win is not to play."

"NBC Sports: When they drop the puck, we drop the ball!"

Good point! Similarly, I was at a restaurant the other day and the cooks forgot to cook my steak. I was going to complain, but then I thought 'What about LGBT rights? Who am I to complain about anything while they suffer?'. So I ate the steak and got worms.

Crippling injuries and disappointment? Sounds like a 'True Met' to me.

They're all well done, but the female ones with the drawn-on breasts look absolutely bizarre. I would suggest omitting them; if the wearer is female they can take of that part themselves.

Yeah, it seems like the piece is actually one long confessional from a person who feels they behaved inappropriately, then tried to turn it into some sort of social commentary. It's very weird.

The easiest way I solve this problem is to use silly, childish terms. I get just as much satisfaction out of calling someone a 'fartknocker' as I would calling them a slur or worse. One time my friends and I spent a Left for Dead 2 session alternating between terms like 'lollerskates' and 'pwnsauce' and it drove the…

Thank God he wasn't the record-holder when the movie came out. That movie would've been hella boring with a nice, humble guy as the incumbent champion.

I find it hilarious you think marriage is some biological imperative and not some wacky concoction that humans created.

John Scalzi makes sweeping assumptions based solely on race. John Scalzi is, therefore, a racist. I'm amazed how many 'enlightened' people like him do not comprehend this.