The second she puts pineapples in macaroni & cheese, I’m gonna smack somebody...

Why are we still giving this trailer trash the time of day?

Yes?

This is the same mindset that produced our “genius” president...

It’s like playing a country song backwards...

You get your 40 acres back, you get your mule back, you get your house back, you get your car back...

Clarke? That clown?

I still insist that Mariah Carey is a human dog whistle...

Steve looked like half of Spy vs. Spy (though I can’t claim that one)...

Now, see, instead of Mad About You or The Office, THIS is what should be coming back to television next...

Zimmerman has become the prototypical #FloridaMan - it’s a wonder he hasn’t become a Darwin Award recipient prior to this point...

How long before the doctors have to break out the leeches and pitchforks?

“I’m so sorry... Oh, by the way, how about some cinnamon rolls!”

Solution: Louisville Slugger applied LIBERALLY and EXCESSIVELY to the sign — and the cranial structure of any individual who gets in the way...

I just listened to April’s report from this morning...

What the living fuck is wrong with you people!?

I’m just sayin...