So you’re balking at the story?

World, meet the newest BEST booth* in baseball.

That solemn bugle solo of “Take Me Out to the Ballgame” at the beginning of the game absolutely did me in.

Its a shit operation. It deserves it. ;)

Err do we have to compare every bad thing that kills people to 9/11?

When asked what he was trying to do he said

So many fans in the stands.

Don't they know that Deadspin frowns on watching your local team unless you live in Barcelona, London, Madrid, or Manchester?

How much wood could a Boychuck chuck if a Boyhuck got chucked into wood?

In reality, USWNT is still a second-tier product, full of dull play and even less compelling players. Why watch USWNT anyways? It's blatantly inferior soccer. The style of play is best described as workmanlike and antithetical to the sport's appeal, the promise of witnessing a moment or two of individual brilliance…

But Billy, why even bother watching USWNT soccer since their level of play is nowhere near that of Chelsea or other world class clubs?

Watch. Billy will be first in line to buy an NYCFC kit.

But, being serious, the premise of this article, to me at least, is flawed. And yes, I realize the hook is firmly in my cheek, but still.

DDPYoga. Seriously, it's the best workout ever for your spine (and the rest of your body no matter what shape or age).

Pictured: The KGB-Sharps

"There's a person that comes on to kick the ball, and doesn't do anything else, and yet gets paid millions of dollars."

She looks like a thug in that picture.

After all, Jack Edwards' eyes have seen the glory...

Photographic evidence that Americans don't care anything about football.