Preemptively posting a giant FUCK YOU to anyone who criticizes this action.

“Actually, the divorce was the best thing that ever happened to me.”

Don’t be sorry. He’s a big goober, but Dwight was incredible at his peak and should absolutely be in the Hall Of Fame.

I don’t want to do this, but Dwight Howard’s resume is really impressive.

As a gentleman who weighs 224 pounds and has only ever been “not really fat” AT BEST in his life, I say unto you: fuck off, sir. Fuck off good and hard.

Are you literally asking for a safe space from a blog post

Dumb and Angry doesn’t actually sound dumb at all. 

Is it wrong that when I read George, overweight and behave as described, I immediately picture this

Have any details about what the package supposedly would’ve been come out? Haven’t seen anything personally.

Cracker Barrel is for Trump voters.

Thats easy, in Alabama its the one with “MURDERERS” spray painted on the outside.

Falconhoof did it better.

“That’s my Colangelo.” - Bryan’s wife, shaking her head and smiling

Could you have backhanded any harder lol

There’s one brewery in Houston that put a playground in their biergarten.

Your post has me picturing Steph’s mom laying well beyond the arc pushing Steph out of her womb for an uncontested 3...thanks.

This. There are so many toddlers roaming around in damn bars these days. What the fuck is that?? I go to places like bars or upscale restaurants expecting to not be around children. If you don’t want to give up your fun pre-kid lifestyle (and it IS fun, which is why I’m keeping it permanently) then don’t have any.

Last weekend I was visiting my brother in Kentucky. We went to the Woodford Reserve Distillery for a tour and some Bourbon. It blew my mind how many people brought their kids there- and not a one of them seemed to be behaving. One child had a meltdown and laid down in the middle of the floor.

I hate the ‘oh well, what can you do’ parents. If you can’t do anything then YOU CAN’T GO ANYWHERE. Stay the fuck home.