Jokes aside, he must be sitting at home laughing his ass off at all of this.

DeMark S. Cousins

It’s a good thing they got rid of McCloughan or this might have gone badly.

I don’t understand how anyone is a fan of the dumpster fire that is the Washington Racial Slur. And I’m a fucking Browns fan.

Well, whatever the excuse, they need to pay him. Cousins is the best quarterback they’ve had there since Duck Williams.

You have a single typo in an insightful internet comment. The man is paid ridiculous amounts of money to not fuck up names at scheduled press conferences. Enough said.

Tom Brady also renegotiates his contracts all the time to backload what the team owes him so they can sign the kinds of players they need to be dominant and Super Bowl contenders every year. So regardless of anything else, it seems like he probably places winning over getting paid. Which when you have a supermodel…

Bell will experience some dreadful injury this year from which no one has ever really recovered, take the rest of the year off for rehab, and then be signed by Chicago for an actual supertanker full of money. He will play a couple of games for them, and then be released due to health issues/poor performance/some sort…

“Lebron brought Cleveland a pro sports championship” is something he can have for the rest of his life, no matter WHAT else happens in his career. Nobody is giving credit to Gilbert for that ring.

They’re gonna build a statue of statue of LeBron bigger than the Colossus of Rhodes who fucking cares about Dan Gilbert

Eh, I think the hometown boy of a championship starved city takes the ring even with hindsight.

Did you see the extent of the “assets” that brought Butler to Minnesota?

“Floyd’s an unapologetic abuser of women and the Internal Revenue Service, while Conor is a racist dipshit”

Since when is ‘I’m an old crazy cracker billionaire with giant statues of an idealized Herculean me in front of the stadium don’t back-sass me boy’ not a good reason?

The article suggests that a black male is already involved.

“For all we know, this guy is just following the NFL’s guide for extorting athletes based on Elliott’s ongoing domestic violence investigation.”

God damnit Zeke stop getting yourself in trouble YOU’RE GOING TO SPEND HALF THE SEASON SUSPENDED AND THEN WHO THE HELL IS GOING TO GET MY FANTASY POINTS IN MY KEEPER LEAGUE?!?!?

Unprovable accusations? Or that a prosecutor didn’t find sufficient evidence to prosecute? Two different things. The NFL also isn’t held to the same standard as a prosecutor when issuing a fine or suspension. Finally, are fake accusations of domestic abuse really a “problem”? Is there anything measurable supporting…