I would never stoop to Comic Sans level!

If I were paid to write for a blog with hundreds of thousands of readers I think I'd up my game a bit.

Okeydokey.

Oh. I guess I didn't get that memo.

It's not an aside if it's the entire paragraph, hon.

You're of course 100% right, but I don't think Tracy 1) understands what those words mean or 2) feels shame/embarrassment.

Between this and Obama/Fancy I'm wondering if there is a parentheses quota you have to fill or something. Write like an adult.

She's had a ton of plastic surgery

Uh how is calling somebody a slack-jawed moron not part of "freedom to do whatever the fuck they want" (which is not a thing)? Ironically, the right to call somebody a slack-jawed moron has been much better established than the "right" to open carry (which doesn't exist or is heavily restricted in most states). You…

I've actually had bad hummus once and I'm STILL pissed off about it. I was visiting my parents and my mom had stocked up on hummus in preparation for my visit, she got two different kinds and one of them was AWFUL! Worst of all I couldn't even remember what it was called, but every time I'm home and she's going to the…

Eeeeeeeescuse me?

Don't they know that holding it sideways looks much cooler?

I... I don't think you know what "freedom of choice" means

They look like the Mexican family that the Gang made over to be more American on Always Sunny

Calm your fucking tits, it's a blurry photo that bears some resemblance to Malia

Why are kittens so damn cute? They're like, the cutest of the small things. Go fuck yourselves, puppies and babies.

I'm growing some kale now. It had been super hot lately and I thought it was over for them cause the growth stagnated. But then it got rainy and cold and those things got TURNT UP. Anyway, this cool story bruh was brought to you by #ilovekale

DUDE. I'm growing my own sprouts but some VILE little green worm is gnawing at them! I was SO excited that they actually germinated because I loves me some brussels sprouts but now I'm worried they won't make it past infancy! whadoido whadoido