Wile E. Covfefe strikes again!

It took me 2 seconds too long to realize you were referring to Bush Jr instead of saying “because he wasn’t White,” meaning that he Magical Negro-ed America’s racist history by sheer dint of his electoral win, creating the lasting peace and harmony among the population that we still enjoy today.

Welcome to America in 2019, where Arians claim to be helping a Gay but really just want to set them further back.

“Tuned up” is brilliant. 

That was just the greatest parody intersection ever. Good God, tying together Platoon, Apocalypse Now, and Wall Street in the space of a few seconds and pced JUST quickly enough where the audience was just a hair behind what they were seeing. Fucking masterful. It’s the same kind of “I understood that reference” gag…

she has been so fantastic in so many great things that she might be my favorite actress ever.

People in Pittsburgh, collectively:

I’m saving reply this post.

Though not the saddest Natalie Wood story.

Shut it down. Everyone is free to go home now. No more comments needed.

Once again, a soccer story that ends with no scoring.

Jesus, something very similar happened to me at a young age. Did me a world of good.

“Got tuned up” is an awesome euphemism for this type of event!

I feel like so much of this could be solved if these people got the shit beat out of them just once in their younger years. Seriously. I really do. 

Remember growing up there was always some girl who was, like, really into horses; they wore sweaters, or had binders, with horses and shit on them?

Put me In Coach, Im Ready

I was really sad to read about the little girl that witnessed the altercation crying but I guess I shouldn’t be surprised that when the Indians get their ass kicked it creates a trail of tears.