Guns don’t kill people. Duffel bags kill people.

Hockey is not a real sport. You cannot have a sport that takes place on ice, and a penalty in that sport called “icing.” It’s more like miniature curling.

Drew,

Wait. Prince Valiant is rated above B.C.? Inconceivable!

Wait. THAT is the photo of Anthony Wiener that will haunt you?

Snape kills dumbledore.

They pay-per-view live-stream the midget sex parties to pay for the camp. It’s a vicious cycle.

They did, but I suspect he now has agoraphobic testicles, so they never will again.

When you say “have to share this horrific story” do you actually mean “take gleeful and sadistic pleasure at the discomfort this will cause all of you Y-chromosome-having bastards as I share this horrific story”?

+1

Look! I have a GIANT COCK...er...BMW! #notbraggingifitstrue

Treebeard would fuck that car up a lot worse than that.

Ooooh! BURN!

Wow. I suspect God ran out of Stupid as He was making you and had to back-order some. Good to know it finally came in...

You are so right! A sport predicated on the taunting and killing of an animal is completely justified because said animal is large and can fight back! Why does no one realize this?

Very a-pee-ling! +1

Which is more expensive: the cost of 15 years in prison for a convicted rapist, or the cost of therapy for his victim, plus the cost of further investigations, police action, court appearances, and even MORE therapy for his next victim? And the same again for the victim after that, if he gets another slap on the wrist.

No worries, you are still a good person! Just empathizing with others is a step in the right direction!

Don’t be ashamed. You aren’t making excuses for a rapist, you just empathized with a father and there is no shame in that.

When someone does something wrong, and you choose not to punish that person when you are responsible for doing so, you give that offender a message. The message is: “What you did is okay.”