my apologies, i should have been more clear. he has long-ass hair. and a long-ass beard which i usually hate. its possible he also has long ass-hair but not long enough for me to notice yet.

There’s a Jules Feiffer cartoon (I think Jules Feiffer, but I’m reporting this second hand, so I don’t know for sure) that shows a woman leaving a guy, and he’s shouting after her, “Men don’t hate women! Men NEED women! Men hate NEEDING!” It makes me laugh, but it also makes me think, “And dude, that is not my…

The only thing I can come up with is that when it comes to self-hatred, women turn it inward, as in “I’m the problem. If I weren’t so ugly/fat/stupid men would like me.” and men turn it outward, as in “They are the problem, They don’t understand me. They just want my money...” and of course, society gives men more…

I’m glad the therapy helped somewhat. I’m honestly not sure there is anything other than more of that that could help. I mean, if not that, are you left with Jordan Peterson style “give incels women provided by the government”? Because...no, fuck no.

Key word is “entitlement”. When you’re told you’re special your whole life, and that’s not reflected in the way your dating life has gone, you’re bound to become disillusioned and angry. People grow up, men especially, thinking they are special or unique in some way, when the reality is that you’re not, and 99.999% of…

Id argue it’s not just porn, but also modern tv, and movies. Look at the age gap of romantic leads, look at the nerd getting the girl from the jock in all those kids movies, look at the heros of action films, look at the popularity of the big bang theory the misogyny of the main guys and how they all still get paired…

I have known short men, men with bad skin, men who went bald in their 20s, unambitious men. To a one, all of them who genuinely liked women ended up in a long-term partnership.

i’m not a supermodel by any means but I think I’m a pretty attractive 30 year old woman. I’m currently dating two men, one of whom is short!!! (only an inch taller than my 5'5 self) and one of whom has long ass hair and a little belly. but guess what! they’re both fucking hilarious and good in bed and fun to be with…

It could help. My therapist did wonders for me, but then I had turned most of my negative feelings against myself. I didn’t think I had been wronged by society or any particular group of people. With incels, we’re probably talking about treating a toxic mix of depression, narcissism, and a sense of alienation among…

A lot of times, they do turn it inwards. These incels have a whole vocabulary to describe why they're undesirable. They will obsess over their jawlines, foreheads and wrists. I think the difference is these men react with anger. "I'm an intellectual, a modern-day Socrates, but women are shallow whores who will only…

That’s the group that I really don’t see a solution for. Guys who are horny and desperately want to ejaculate with a female participant can hire a professional. Then they can shed the dreaded virgin label and know what it feels like.

It’s not so much that men turn it outward as they reverse cause and effect. “I don’t get laid because I’m depressed and anti-social” gets turned into “I’m depressed and anti-social because I don’t get laid” - which means, of course, that even if they did get laid it wouldn’t make them feel any better or solve any of…

I’ve been turned down for dates by more women than I can count. When I started trying to date as a teenager, my mom (divorced) would tell me, “Okay. Well, she doesn’t want to go out with you. Maybe she doesn’t like you or you’re not her type. Figure out how to be better and move on.”

The fact that your friend isn’t interested in women in his own peer group (working class, look their age) and wants a trophy girlfriend is the key to his problem right there- he doesn’t like women. He wants a possession to show off to other men; it’s got nothing to do with actual companionship.

Awesome, I never know how comfortable people are with confrontation. I’ve had smaller co workers (I work In a lab setting) complain about a shipping and receiving person, so I specifically went as the bigger person hurr hurr, to have a “dude, I know your old, and I want you to know that your actions personally bother…

Break-ups and rejections aren’t personal affronts, they’re the natural result of the trial-and-error that goes into living your fucking life.

I really think it’s porn.

I think deep down he just likes to be angry.

I had similar experiences. My father was very hard on me because I was an overweight teenager. I’ve had doors slammed in my face by men, who happily held them open for my more attractive friends. I’ve been openly called dog and ugly by random strangers. I didn’t have a single date for nearly 10 years, but it didn’t…

I actually have called him out. He was literally struck dumb by the idea that I thought he could be patronizing and condescending, even when I cited instances. I think we’ve remained friends because I’m married and physically unattractive to him, not being a 21 year old bikini model. And there are plenty of other men…