I know! She was so talented back then, even when she was wee. Her name is Sally J. Johnson, and this track is called Dreaming Out Loud. I'm so proud of her!

One of the best parts of college for me was the time I stole an entire 5-gallon bag of whole milk from the cafeteria. I made several pounds of fresh mozzarella for Italian food night in my cooking-themed living group. Because I'm a nerd.

Was hoping for a twist ending.

What brilliant psychology major came up with these ideas you ask?

Nooooo! The chubby little hand! The fat cheeks and sweet smile! The hug! I can't. I can't. I can't. My ovaries. My uterus. Imma be real and confess to a twinge of phantom letdown in the old ta-tas. This picture is completely hijacking my lady parts. MAKE IT STOP!

This Panasonic Viera one, because I used to babysit the woman who did the music!

All of the Isaiah Mustafa Old Spice commercials.

Hoboy, this is embarrassing, but here we go . . . The herbal essences commercials. I've always had a weird fixation on having my hair washed, which turned into a fetish when I hit puberty. At 13 I didn't really understand the play on words that was "a totally organic experience," but the commercials with the ladies…

Terry Crews and Old Spice. This commercials convinced me to switch my body spray brand.

I know who the real weirdo is. It's my husband who eats home fries with pizza and never drinks milk.

Right?!?! And everyone was always bitching about the cafeteria, while inside I was thinking, "But the unlimited chocolate milk! I have found nirvana!"

People give me crap for that, too. But your brother is DEFINITELY the weird one. Tuna? Does he live in Tokyo and go to Pizza Hut there? Is that why he eats bad food?

I also receive criticism for drinking it with Chinese take-out. But it goes with everything, dammit!

Ugh, you both are!

Per the advice given here, I back away thusly when encountering a lesbian:

That Superman, always with the attempted murder...

Being a dick is the best possible tribute to Superman's memory.

Because he's a dick.

Good eye, though!

"emotional, impactful and classic story that I know will survive the test of time."

His Highness is not impressed.