Like men could be shittier.

You couldn’t pay me any amount of money to work for this administration, but that is a good salary for DC. Though it’s probably not very good if you break it down hourly. 

Parenting: you’re doing it right!

Watching your own kids isn’t babysitting, it’s parenting and cleaning up after yourself isn’t a kink*, it’s being a fucking adult.

I definitely read that as A.J. Daulerio first and was v. confused. 

Have you googled “Santorum” lately?  #winning

Not punishing just the hackers though! 

America’s Ass, pre-Chris Evans

I have never killed any one, but I have read some obituary notices with great satisfaction.  (Clarence Darrow)