He did do it. It is a fact.

Or just turning his freaking head to look if she's lying next to him

I was going to say "obvious horseshit," but slightly implausible works too.

It's like he hired all the Delia's designers that ran that business into the ground and said "do classic! Do 1995! Do Donna Martin pre-graduation!"

How Adam Levine designs clothes:

Adam, you've already created the perfect shirt to explain how I feel about this career choice:

That's not at all what I'm suggesting. I'm saying that it's better to say no than say yes and be resentful about having said yes. And I do think that brides should recognize that it's expensive and a big time commitment, and not everyone is at the point in their lives where it's possible, and if a bridesmaid says no…

Someone give Oscar an Oscar! (And also a life sentence for murder.)

I feel like most if not all of his brain probably believes he is innocent... ... I do not believe his brain is correct.

This guy is a sociopath. UGH.

So two of the key witnesses involved are being charged with conduct violations in relation to "the incident", wherein that "incident" is apparently considered not to have been "an incident" as far as the star quarterback was concerned.

Ah, FSU.

Right! Also, in the audio, he keeps saying "In the old days, you didn't even get time off!" Well, in the old days, they also didn't let black people play. Pull yourself together.

If your line-up can't handle a couple games without a key player, you probably have bigger problems to address.

Seriously. OMG an older man was interested in a young girl (who he thought was legal)? SHOCKING. Stop the presses, when is someone interested in someone who is not withing 5 years of their own age!

You're incredibly fucked up.

I like the phrase "struggle twerk."

Well he did a really shit job of taking out Mr.Ole Ole walking right next to her. But hey, that 100 lb coed, slowly walking down a sidewalk had it coming.

I'm sure he failed at that job. Mightily.