can anyone else hear the *brrriiing brrriiing* of their handlebar bicycle bells as they roll by?

I[ve never had sex

I bet a lot of people on that list made their donations from the wall phone in the kitchen.

Though I certainly understand why he chose not to, I honestly wish Biden had run- and please don’t take that as anti-Hillary, because I have a lot of faith in her. But I often think that Biden would not only wipe the floor with Trump, but do it in such an all encompassing policy and straight-talk smackdown way that…

Trump: Actually I am a Dracula who does all sorts of neck bites (kills Anderson cooper, hisses into camera)

Hey Anna! Remember this? Looks like YOU’RE the idiot now! LOL

You’re sure it isn’t just a falsie flag?

“The reason I bring all this up,” Pitino says, “is those girls were hot enough to melt steel beams! Hooah!”

yea I think some people are willing to play with tree rats like that. Try this: Make teeny tiny paper books by folding a card in half, with peanut butter in the middle. Put it wherever stupid squirrels are invading your life. It looks like they are reading books when they eat the pb. It is the only time I have ever…

Can’t wait for Trump to waddle up to the podium and grab his folded piece of paper from his jacked pocket, covered in YUGE sharpie notes, and proceed to give his awful stump speech filled with more rubber dogshit than that cargo plane out of Hong Kong from Top Gun.

My personal fav was when she said “he choked” while in Mexico. The train flew clear off the tracks after that.

Literally.

English farmer Maud Lee and her daughter Pat enjoying tea with their lamb Betty in 1949

“Eh, a three flanked by two fours.”

It’s not often you see the black sheep of the family invited over for tea.

He moved on her as if he was desperate for some pussy and got shot down, making him a bitch.

I love/am intrigued by “Penis” written on the supporting pole of that sight. It seems to serve no other purpose other to indicate that there are penises inside Erotic Heritage Museum as it should be. It’s like writing “Food” on the side of a supermarket.

I was promised a taco truck on every corner, and yet there are no taco trucks on any corners anywhere in the vicinity of my home, school, or workplace. This is very disappointing, and I respectfully request that the situation be rectified immediately, as it is approaching lunch time and I am hungry.

Eh, I can’t imagine his attempts voter suppression would be enough to cancel out all the minority voter registration his candidacy has accelerated. Hell, while we’re discussing turnout, constantly telling his own supporters that their votes aren’t going to be counted isn’t a great way to ensure they actually get off…