Can you imagine all that goddamn running and coming up six seconds short of the record? That’s why I’ll stick with Mad Men marathons, thanks. That and the overall lack of conditioning sufficient to get to the fridge without a time out on the way.

Coincidentally, Ronald McPhatter is what they call a Quarter Pounder in Belgium.

“The proposal looks fairly good, Mr. Hansen, but why only 8,000 tents for the homeless during the off-season?”

This is *not* going to go over well at the Billionaires Club holiday brunch.

I’m sorry, I Curse Zoidberg!’s Mom. (You suck.)

To be fair, though, you and your family pretty much suck.

“Basketball players are like crawfish . . .”

That’s some number 2 alright.

“Ware’s house?”

You’re right. They should give him a raise.

“After 20 years of being told by our window-dressing partner that men hurting women is a bad thing, we finally realized that they meant a bad PR thing, and now we get it.”

In Maine, weird is a whole state thing.

Don’t arbor a grudge — he’s trying.

Not to be harsh, but if you feed the meter 45-minutes worth for a 30-minute appointment, that’s kinda on you.

This was written with all the clarity and sense of purpose I expect from a — former sports administrator of some sort, if I followed that?

Dyson sucks.

NEVER FORGET

“It was a sloppy, messy, nasty affair.”

I’m up late googling good teen action and I get this shit?

a/k/a: Manchhattan, Manch Francisco