6 more. Next question.

I work for a wastewater tech company and the poop jokes are endless. It’s fantastic.

Pictured: Kobe Bryant (R) and the Lakers’ #2 draft pick

1. Statler & Waldorf

Rizzo third is the kind of boldness that suggests you, Leslie, will be chosen to be one our civilization’s leaders after the apocalypse. Leaving Beaker outside the top 10, however, suggests we’re going to revolt against you shortly thereafter.

I didn’t see the part where you ask for the WiFi password so you can bury your head in your phone all day.

KEN COSGROVE TOP FUCKING 10 OR THERES THE DOOR

I’d have put him top five. It’s not who you like.

Freddie Rumsen at 17??? Fuck you.

Charles P. Pierce writes like you’d expect an good writer to write. Bill Simmons is not a good writer. He’s just a man, and that was the appeal. He ran out of personality, he ran out of references, he ran out of life experience to bundle into columns.

The first straw was being a 40-year-old wrestling fan.

Serious answer: Katie Baker.

Unfortunately we probably will never know the answer, given how uncomfortable Bill Simmons has historically been in making things about himself.

Timofey reminds me of an awkward, European Gronk.

Nutcase could break into my house and steal him at night. Nutcase could throw a ninja throwing star at him while I walk with him. Nutcase could shoot up the playground he’s in. Aliens could teleport him off his big wheel at the park. An evil horse could hunt him down and kick him in the chest. There’s some risks for…

There is absolutely NO , ZERO, NADA reasons to leave a child unattended in a car. If a person does this, they are idiots and should be charged with child endangerment.

I stayed in the car many times as a kid, and let me tell you it was far preferable sitting in the car playing with legos, drawing or reading a book than being drug into and out of every stupid store with mom. Of course there are limits, the child’s age and length of the stop should play some part.

Another thing is the zero tolerance groups want to conflate child deaths because of being FORGOTTEN in the car for say a whole work day , and the act of INTENTIONALLY leaving a child for 5-15 mins. The two situations are not at all the same. Zero tolerance policies are not going change anything about the variables…