I know, right? What a horrible, terrifying conclusion to reach. And thanks for taking me way more seriously than I deserve; I really was just snarking my way to certainty — this being the Cubs and all — that this super-spectacular, big-time free-agent signing will turn out miserably for everybody involved.

I don't see this turning out like Jay Cutler at ALL.

THANK. YOU. The fade route is the chicken-shittiest play in the game, just abject BEGGING for the penalty flag, every damn time.

If only there were some old, white, male sportswriters who could even all this out.

But Lebron was cool with playing when Sterling was just actively discriminating against black and hispanic people all over Los Angeles County, rather than just spouting stupidity that offends but doesn't actually harm. Faaaantastic!