Starting it off early this year.

Notable predictions from Stephen A. Smith’s ancestors:

I don’t know what part of the Midwest you were in, but around here everyone thinks they are a trash bird that spends its time shitting on golf courses. And walking around with a conveniently golf ball sized head at the end of a long golf tee like neck, acting like I wouldn’t murder its smug ass given half a chance.

It’s just as satisfying to shit talk a cheetah whether you have kids or not.

There’s absolutely nothing wrong with going to the zoo as an adult with no kids. Anyone who says otherwise is a communist.

he should shut up and just be thankful he’s not getting called for the 3x he’s fouling lebron on every possession

If your friend was a true fiscal conservative, he wouldn’t be a Republican.

My best friend and college roommate for three years is a conservative, and was a member of the college Republicans. He was (and is) an exemplary conservative and one whom I wish the party was full of.

I can put a lot of holes into this theory.

Good on you for owning up. Many Gawker Media writers do cartwheels to avoid responsibility when they’re wrong, and that’s something that alienates readers like nothing else.

That’s almost entirely down to pace. Put the ORTG chart up there (per 100 possessions) and you’ll see a different picture. Offense is easier in the sense that there is no hand-checking on the perimeter and less physical play down low, and harder in the sense that defenses are given more latitude to trap and help. I…

Bill Simmons fucking hates this idea.

I think the Bucks are OK. When the scammer saw one of the names listed as “Giannis Antetokounmpo”, he figured the Bucks’ employee was wise to his scam and just sending fake info.

/entire group of Deadspin commenters pass out from sudden blood loss to the brain

Still not as impressive as what JaMarcus Russell consumes on a daily basis, though to be fair there isn’t a single mention of “purple” anywhere in Bjornsson’s list.

Geez, Cleveland gets all the luck.

I can’t wait for that pivotal moment in time when Fox Sports has Skip Bayless, Clay Travis, Jason Whitlock, Colin Cowherd, and maybe Curt Schilling all under one roof.

Obligatory:

I’ve composed a poem/insane person rant using all of Drew’s all caps words: