It took 25 years, but it looks like I'm no longer the biggest fuckface in this town.

(George Bush named to Independent Investigation Committee)

"Ignorance is not a suitable defense."

Pictured: Roger Goodell

Done.

Today we spell vindication: S-C-H-E-F-T-E-R

Goodell has mishandled this so badly that his actions make TMZ seem like a professional and dignified news organization.

"Frankly, Roger, I'm as shocked as you are. Keith has never been one to go rogue before. His references from previous employers are sterling!"

I fucking love Katie Nolan.

Is Goodell trying to mimic how Richard Nixon handled Watergate?

If you follow the NFL's train of thought, you can't even pass their own concussion protocol.

I don't think it contradicts it at all. Some NFL employees could have seen the tape on the casino's own monitors, reported back, and the higher ups decided they'd rather have plausible deniability than request their own copy.

When TMZ is seen as Woodard and Bernstein for breaking this story, you know the NFL is in deep shit.

Ray Lewis: There is no comparison of me and Ray Rice. I'm far more similar to Aaron Hernandez.

So when is Roger Goodell getting released?

Ravens PR guy: "I liked Ray Rice a lot then. I like Ray Rice a lot today"

#domesticviolencemeansyoureofftheteamunlessyournameiskaepernick