That's it.

This sort of sobering incident sends a message.

Wasn't going to work anyway. I heard there are airports near the proposed Farmer's Field, and we all know that's a huge risk.

"I mean, Chip Kelly's never denied being a Grand Wizard of the KKK. Why won't he just come out and say he wasn't? What does he have to hide???"

Benefits:

WALMART: We don't have any Dez Bryant parking lot video

"Wait? It really wasn't him?"

Managing Up... Spending all your time and energy on Performance Reviews... Sabotaging others to keep your place high in the stack-ranking...

Sitting back and making money while other people do the real work? That sounds very American.

When you join the Mariners, you get October off.

The only way this team would be more insufferable is if it were owned by "Classy Bob" (TM) Kraft.

Football's Larry Bird.

What's the rationale here, "We're stuck in Detroit, so he should be too!"?

"lifestyle" is dog-whistle buzzword for choice. Implying Bean *chooses* to be gay, according to Murphy.

Well, Mr. Knight already went to the trouble of booking a luxury suite at the tournament site. The Fightin' Phils do have their priorities, you know.

Hey, look! It took 710 less than 36 hours to pop out a passive-aggressive "Marshawn's a Malcontent" story.

I'd settle for a team with a shred of dignity and 100% fewer Ginger Hammer slumber parties.

The reverse of this list are the hacks Russell Wilson has to throw to.

He'll have a long, fruitful career there.

"Who would do such a thing?"
—Golden Tate.