Not necessarily; have you ever heard the Tragedy of Darth Plagueius the Wise?

Aw c’mon, you can’t imagine Sheev siding up to a waitress at a cocktail bar all, “Hey baby, always there are two knowwhatimsayin?”

Yeah that doesn’t sit right with me, cause Palpatine’s got some serious Adrian Veidt ‘I’ve never given myself to a woman’ energy. 

On the plus side, I’d like to think that Abrams did introduce one important new finding: SHEEV PALPATINE FUCKS. THERE’S HOPE FOR US ALL, FELLOW SINGLES. 

Pillar men cannot NOT be accompanied by the appropriate theme

He’s sort of a cosmic level Ron Swanson.

I repeatedly say to my myself in 2065 on a sunny, 100° day in late December, as I drink dog urine from a rusty hub cap and roast a leather boot over a diaper fire for dinner. 

Wait! What? I’m confused. I thought women loved it when strangers just go up and touch your hair. Hmmm, I may have to change some of my habits.

“BuT hE’s NoT eVeN a DeMoCrAt”

People just like being mad. Starfire has never been a sensible dresser.

I thought the first post-credits scene was a killer, but the second one was a little Ant-iclimactic.

Hold up. Since when is titty sucking bad?

Those are the nipples of a God. No man alone can be used as a reference. They probably had a huge contest and chose the top 100 strongest, manliest and sexiest man alive and fused all their nipples together to make the ultimate nipples. Or maybe it’s just Greg’s tits from the art department.

Mature Gambino.

#JusticeForGoro

You’re correct.

No one wants to stare at those ugly uniforms for seven minutes.

Facts: Touch and Dare by Stan Bush for this movie may be the two greatest songs made for any film in history. Fight me over this. I will end your world like Unicron.

Annihilation: The Men-Only Fanedit