Old as balls and I'm sure you've seen it, but I'm sharing it for those who haven't.

She's a terrific actress and was robbed of an Oscar back during The Color Purple. Whoopi, too.

I like Paula, but the woman in the book was dark-skinned with dreads, and helped Precious to accept her dark skin. I'll be frank: I can't stand Lee Daniels and his whitey-loving ways. We get it, dude: you're not fond of black people because we're homophobic and we suck. Sheesh.

I remember writing about Little Rock's Lost Year all through high school and college (the second go-round) when it came time for big research papers for the simple fact that not one of my history teachers or professors had ever heard of it. I mean, never. One professor thought I was making the shit up. Needless to…

Actually, I do. There was an article on it that I wish to God I could find, but it's so eye-opening. Back in the day, when doctors routinely denied blacks any medical care, menthols were touted as being medicinal. Later on, you'd see lots of black celebrities endorsing menthols. It's the honest-to-goodness truth -…

You got off lucky. All we get is how Malcolm X hated white people - and if there's any group who needed compassion and protection in the 1960s, it was white people.

Won't somebody please think of the poor, poor murderous cops!?!?

...are you fucking kidding?

Only thing I can think when women say that is how sad it is that they hadn't accomplished jack shit else in their lives. I NEVER hear men talk about their greatest accomplishment being fatherhood. Greatest joy, maybe. But ACCOMPLISHMENT? Fuck outta here.

That's why my dad and I get along. He was the first one to sincerely apologize and make good. My mom was just going through the motions for a long, long time.

I had to hear all about how my stepfather wasn't my real father and "he doesn't have to do any of these things for you!" I snapped one day and told her that was the dumbest shit I'd ever heard in my (admittedly short) life. Even at 10 years old, I knew that when you marry a woman with kids, you treat her kids like…

I told my mother flat out to keep her mouth shut about my childhood. My parents are great parents to an adult child, but to a child-child? Never did a more abusive pair of fuckups walk this earth. Under no circumstances will I tell that woman that she was a good mother, and I told her that a part of me will hate her…

My dad used to never tip. He thought the delivery fee was the tip. When I explained that they drivers don't get that fee, he was mindblown. He started tipping, and lo and behold - the pizzas were coming faster and hotter, with a few extras chicken tenders or breadsticks thrown in.

Lupita said no, because she had heard tale/seen episodes of The Real Housewives of Atlanta and knew that Kenya, while beautiful of face, was ugly of heart.

"I conceded to an abortion"

My old mentor teacher has twin boys who look like a pair of raindrops. You can only tell them apart because one wears red shoelaces and the other wears blue. One day, I asked her how she told them apart without their shoes, thinking I would learn about some cool "mother's instinct" power. She admitted that she can't -…

DAMN, looking at that top picture makes me sad as hell. Fuck Cosby. Fuck Claire. Fuck Rudy. Fuck, there goes my whole damn childhood.

I recently downgraded from 236 mods to 209. So...yeah. Good luck.

Right!? More like the FIRST victim!

Rosie Perez? That was my first thought. Either way, that is not her natural speaking voice by a mile. She sounds ridiculous.