Yeah, what a dog.

The best thing about aging is that the older I get, the fewer fucks I give about the opinions of dickwads like these.

Satire should be funny.

Troll score: 0/10

What I want to know how "snitching" became wrong for crimes like this.

Hellooooooo nurse!

There's something weird going on in this post where we're supposed be praising a body type that's not usually very well regarded in popular media, but then it's bashing people for not meeting the specific criteria of that particular body type, like being "too fat". I don't really understand what the message is…

WOMP WOMP.

What is with that FACE? WHY IS EVERYONE MAKING THAT FACE? And is there some sort of scientific reason why every time I see it, I get so ragey that all I want to do is drop the guy with a kick to the balls and then sit on his chest and pummel his face until his features turn into an unidentifiable bloody soup? …

Yeah, we had a literal classroom of children shot up and killed and this fucking country has deniers and people who still refuse to do anything about it.

Right?!?! I hope the love scenes are punctuated with the Law & Order "chung-chung" sound at strategic points.

I still can't believe someone would have sex with Glen Beck. It is unnatural!

Personally, I think polygamy should be legal. I mean if 3 people want to get married, why shouldn't they? And if it's regulated, all that FDS "polygamy" can still be prosecuted simply as the "child rape" that it actually is.

I'm here, darling!

That's ridiculous. Keith Ablow will never find three humans who would marry him.

Yes, once you hit 31, you will no longer be able to attract a sweet prince like Springfieldpervert. Truly, all the light will be gone from your life.

Given this article's subject matter, it's rather ironic that you're talking out of your arse hole.

I find Michael Phelps's tanlines both ludicrous and lickable.