Hi ‘Owner of Northwest Arkansas Mercedes Dealership’ !! Welcome to Jalopnik!

[Dealer]: Shit. How much is this gonna cost me?

Car dealers are so unpopular that a jury can’t wait to slap them with punitive damages that are 287x greater than the actual damages. These are my kind of people, because for every successful civil suit against dealerships there are most likely greater than 287 unsuccessful suits.

Is this a made up problem? Other than the only actual picture of one event, how prevalent is this?

This is a great LeBron moment, but my favorite will always be that clip of him telling his wife to put the j away during the World Series once he realized they were on camera.

Los Angeles really put a CHARGE into the Kan-SAWS City CREEPS tonight!!! HEE-HEE-HEEEEEEE!!! They were seeing Rivers all over the field - RIVERS OF BLOOD!!! MWAH-HA-HA-HA-HAAAA!!!

No surprise that she’s the sort of brassy person who would blow her own horn.

Lamar Miller only had one last month, he had another 3 or 4 years ago

I know it’s just an intern who typed it, but I like to imagine it’s the entire organization owning Darren Rovell. And that brings me so much joy.

Yessssssss, pump it directly into my veins. That’s worth waking up for.

I’ve flown private a few times and I always find it kind of weird how one of the most touted things is skipping TSA and the “many hours it saves us”. I fly between SFO, LAX and JFK constantly and can’t remember the last time I was in a TSA line longer than 5 or so minutes.

..if the company considers accurate descriptions of what they do “unnecessarily demeaning,” the problem is perhaps not with the coverage.

That’s a saying all over the country.

McConnell is going to get the last laugh. You know how long turtles live?

[clears throat]

Just because most residents finish their education in 3rd grade does not make those places “finishing schools”

This was also his 3rd or 4th attempt on that island. They had previously shot at him.

That's fair.

Griffin doesn’t have to be brilliant elite, he just has to be competent.

“How can I correct a server who mispronounces a dish?”