Much like Gary Larson's post-drawing analysis to his own "Cow Tools" Far Side cartoon, their statement should have read "Our first mistake was in believing this was funny."

Yukon stop any time you like, you know.

This news is less a highlight in Third Eye Blind's career and more a low point in Silversun Pickups's.

Really good observations, Mr. Purdom. I admire Brian Eno's constant prodding at the envelope containing the words "music/technology intersection" on it, even if I don't think any of his apps are ultimately for me. We're in a time when there are so many WAYS to consume music, ambient or otherwise, that it's becoming…

"Hey, buddy, I work for SkyMall!" - Jim Gaffigan's audience voice

Oh, shut up, Cocaine. You're on the drugs.

Bowl contents check. In it you'll find: two and a half lackluster scoops of rice; one soupy scoop of black beans; one and one half portions of that alleged chorizo stuff; one scoop of "hot" salsa; one scoop of medium salsa; one half scoop of mild salsa due to the counter person automatically assuming you wanted it…

When it comes to pun threads, urethra fan of them or you're not.

Not pictured: the Making A Murderer game, which just keeps taking away any infinitesimal progress you make and eventually leaves you with no faith in the state of gaming itself.

Both Natalie Morales and myself thank you profusely for selecting question 10 for 2017, Marah et al.! And whoever else suggested it first in that giant thread of question submissions, because there was probably someone before me. I'm a big fan of that person, and not many people—including myself—would guess that. …

I straight-up adore Earthling (1997), both for its hevvvvy tendencies (maybe Bowie's last real guitar-fest of an album, courtesy of Reeves Gabrels in overdrive) and for lyrics that are by turns playful ("Little Wonder"), evocative ("Seven Years In Tibet"), and more darkly relevant with each passing day ("I'm Afraid Of…

I did greatly enjoy Natalie Morales's "Who are you a big fan of that we wouldn't necessarily know about?" from this "season" of questions. Particularly if that person practices a discipline that's different from that of the interviewee. You never know exactly how one person's work influences anothers—and it may even…

Let's see that official OSHA SDS…hmm, main ingredient is "Distillates (petroleum)"…considered combustible by WHMIS standards…"may cause skin irritation…may cause sensitization by skin contact".

True, it's hardly a universally appealing odor. Mrs. Mattman Begins gets an instant migraine when I'm using it to clean that ugly old "sealed for your protection" glue off used CD cases. We've taken to referring to it as "Mrs. Mattman Begins Repellent".

Folks, I don't see the problem here. As Donald Trump's new appointee to head the Food & Drug Administration, I'm inherently qualified to make proclamations on the safety of Goo-Gone™! At least, that's what Scott Pruitt, his EPA director, told me after he had me park his car for him!

Oh, the interview was so short as to not be worth posting. She was fairly Neggardly in her responses.

Douse yourself downtown with Goo-Gone™, Rob. Not only will it eventually take care of the adhesive, not only will it erase all evidence of your compulsive masturbation—hence its name—but it will leave you with a pleasant citrus scent.

Look, Santa, I can see you're really upset by this. I honestly think you ought to sit down calmly, eat some cookies and milk, and think things over.

Drug Enforcement Agency

MYOOOOSICAL Guest, Not My Grandson!