Had my choice of watching this piece of shit game on ESPN, MSG, and SNY yesterday. I call it the Triple Brown.

Rex above anyone should understand someone toeing the line.  

All worthless officiating mea culpas, whatever the sport, should be read at a press conference by Hedonism Bot, just to show you how few underlying fucks the offending league gives.

Ya know, it’s Sherman… So his toe slipped over the line a little, big deal. It’s just a game, man. 

(last will and testament is read) (she is sold to a Russian oligarch to pay off his debts)

I guess this means Donald is Glenn Quagmire (only older, fatter, and with a head injury)?

Tiffany is the Meg Griffin of the Trumps.

And then they came for the group gatherings, And I didn’t speakup because I could go to the bar; And then they came for the barkeeps, And I didn’t speak up because I could stream illegally; And then . . . they came for me . . . And by that time i was watching porn because, who cares about Jags V. Titans?

I hope they paid him, just to show how ridiculous the rules are.

It’s a good thing he could fill in. Usually Travis Henry takes these gigs, but he could only find eight babysitters

He did nothing but practice against other college players while in Cleveland.

“This is what 2 ypc looks like” is a pretty good way to help a defense visualize a positive outcome.

“I said show them a scrum! A SCRUM!”

Now and then the NFL is embarrassed by its long-standing practice of ignoring players’ voices.

How many QBs is this gonna cost them?

That’s gotta leave their fans feeling aggievated

Part of the Light Years Ahead Strategy, #LYAS, The Warriors have pivoted to Curry not making 3's. It’s going to disrupt the NBA and is all part of their bold, innovative culture.

As if his hands could wrap all the way around a baby’s neck.

This was the Michael Jordan of all Bill Simmons imitations.

That’s like when I was talking to my buddy Hench about how Phil Simms is an idiot because he always says “I was talking to...” and we were talking about when I was talking to House about when he was talking about Phil Simms.