Easy, my first car. A 1982 Chevy S-10 with the 2.8L V6 and 2 WD. It was a truly awful ride, and I just made it worse with my shenanigans. But, it was my first car! Freedom of the road and car sex made it a beautiful vehicle.

Jezebel is a couple links over. Stay in your lane.

Damn, jelly much?

Because Penguins.

Cigarette smoker? Bad driver. God dammit if you have a kid in the car and you’re smoking.

Am I the only one that read it as “fleshlight”? Whoops, though 10/10 would hoon a new fleshlight.

Right? It would be so strange to hear that he had normal feet.

Wow, excellent. Just excellent.

This one is weird. But I have a fear of driving through Nebraska and having some kid run out from the corn fields and I run him over. Then I put him in the trunk while trying to find a town with authorities. Finally, I find a town, but it’s all run by kids who worship He Who Walks Behind The Rows. It gets darker from…

That’s a quality Dad move right there. Might have to remember that one.

To be fair, all Flyers deserve a stick to the face.

It would make you an asshole for fucking with them because they don’t hold the same views as you.

That was a fantastic episode. I haven’t watched that show in 20+ years and knew exactly what this was immediately. Good stuff.

Right?!? Couldn’t have upped that monthly payment from $40 to $50 to purchase it.

Right? What is this guy, a cop or something?

This killed me. Actually had people down the office hallway ask if I’m OK.

CP all day. This POS wasn’t worth $4K brand new, but now?

Way to be offended by everything. Maybe the internet isn’t the place for you.

I’m gonna pile on here for fun, but fuck this guy. Yes, he’s the best player in the league. But damn, he’s such a fucking dick.

Yup, the DMV area is a traffic disaster. Much nicer here in Colorado now.