In a way, I hope the GOP wastes the next year and a half trying to kill the ACA. We already have a public that is primed to want M4A and got royally pissed the last time the GOP tried to repeal and replace. Another protracted battle over healthcare might actually be a boon to Democrats going into 2020. And at the end…

*meanwhile over at the Onion offices*

The one and only drawback of mushrooms is that whole ‘you’d better know exactly the difference between different types otherwise you might fatally poison yourself’ thing. 

It would be an interesting idea. But ultimately, I think trying to fix America writ large’s dietary woes through punitive taxes is a fundamentally flawed idea. While personal choice does play a role into what people eat, you also have to take a hard look at the economic realities of many people and understand that…

I mean, really, show me any version of some over complicated meat substitute that rocks it harder than grilled mushrooms.

And here I thought they just used unclaimed lost children harvested from their theme parks as human guinea pigs. 

If they ever open up franchising for this, it would be worth it for someone to open a location and then deliberately not offer lasagna just to watch people lose their fucking minds over it. 

All the menu item names make no sense and where the description of the dish would be it only ever says “Caption This!”

How about a Leghorns theme restaurant, where wait staff deliberately try to push the buttons of married couples until they either divorce or engage in a public display of domestic violence.

Come for Happy Hour where you can pelt Binky the Clown with tomatoes!

*Rest of the 2020 pack shuffle a quarter inch to the left on Israel*

Given how frilly kale is, this makes sense. I’d imagine some things like cabbage and artichokes are also at risk of this, given the layers they have. 

No. I don’t know what the obsession is with turning food into fucking foams, but I just don’t get it. Like it just does not seem appealing at all. The one exception is whip cream and thats pretty much it. 

Honestly, that might be the only semi-solid argument of doing circumcision at birth, that generally speaking, you aren’t going to remember it, unless of course something gets botched. It seems to be a common thing for people that undergo it later in life tend to have a tough time of it in recovery.

On the one hand, I kind of get being anti-circumcision. I think we’ve pretty much come to the conclusion that it is completely unnecessary from any standpoint.

Frankly, if I want a ‘veggie’ Phillie Cheese steak, I’d rather just sub out the meat for a metric fuck ton of sauteed mushrooms. 

I bet the dude on the left was like “Look, I know I’m fat but did you have to use the fucking fish-eye lense?”

No. Next question.

I think you missed the caveat:

pretty much...