To be fair, Beyonce has straight up fuck you money. Cardi B and Danai Gurira probably don’t have thanks but no thanks money/don’t call us we’ll call you money/let me weigh my options money/let me sleep on it money, yet.

I mean, we had to get over losing the Civil War but you don’t hear us bitching and moaning about that do you?

You only have to be YOU all the time.  Again, for those in the cheap seats. All Black folks aren’t the same and we’re entitled to be different, dress different, like different things. Okay? Okay.

Black people wear flip flops in the U.S. when it’s hot, though. This is the first I’m hearing that any American negro thinks of flip flops as “white people” stuff.

Maybe if he didn’t have such a basic reductive caricature of blackness as an aspirational model then he wouldn’t feel so burdened and conflicted by it. Fried bologna and spades??? Heckin Woof, bruh. It’s a black thing if a black person is doing it. What is this 3rd grade Oreo coconut “am I still black if I like…

It’s so much bullshit. I grew up in a majority Black neighborhood, and my best friend’s family went apple picking. I’ve never even heard that we aren’t supposed to wear flip flops. My on-the-edge-of-Hotep boyfriend loves Natalie Merchant and is a fiend for punk music. I am a crazy dog lover who refers to her dog as…

You realize subways are electric, right? You also realize one train can move HUNDREDS of people at once, right? Breakdowns are due to deferred maintenance, not because the concept is flawed.

ALL THE MEN IN HER FAMILY ARE CHINLESS, ASEXUAL DIPSHITS

If they don’t all end up in jail at some point in the future, I hope they at least have to experience living in poverty. I don’t for a second think it’ll give them perspective or empathy for the rest of us who have been there, but it might be a fate worse than jail for this morons.

Weirdly, I think this is the first time I’ve ever seen the Kushner children named ... like, anywhere. For all the angst in the media about Barron getting caught up in the news cycle windmill ... they’ve done a remarkably good job of keeping their children out of the spotlight.

Can’t wait for the TV/film adaptation starring Vince Kartheiser as Jared!

I would be 1000% on this if they brought back Valkyrie for this.  

Didn’t know I needed the Captain Marvel sequel to be a buddy pic with Thor, but that last clip did the job. Though it’s too bad she didn’t grab the hammer as it flew past her face.

Considering how infuriating a character Star-Lord is, I’m hoping we don’t see Pratt at any point of the film, even when they are all inevitably brought back.

I’m not a Klobuchar fan because I found the reports about her workplace abuses well-founded, but I think this article could have covered them with more than a few sarcastic lines.  It feels like I’m missing half an article.

Reminder: This isn’t about the real you and your real life; this is about two fake brides and their fake feud.

I think I like Jennifer Garner a little more every time I see her. Her Instagram is a delight, and it’s hard not to like someone who coordinates their gift wrap with a pair of running shoes.

I don’t get it. THIS IS NOT HOW IT WORKS. You choose to get rid of things that don’t bring you joy. If you are getting rid of things just to appease your girlfriend or are going along with the whole process because ‘UGH, LADIES AMIRITE BRO?’

Anyway, if you’re upset your significant other is making you sell a $1,100 snakeskin jacket that you never wear but like to tell other people you have, you’re lucky she’s not tossing you out with the rest of the joyless crap. Just one clutter-submerged woman’s opinion!

Living in cluttered, disorganised chaos with a person with hoarding tendencies who doesn’t like to part with even useless possessions is not a ‘minor flaw’.