And then Drew ran back up stairs to bed before his parents caught him and grounded him for watching football on a work night. When he got to bed, he wrapped himself in his blanket and sobbed himself to sleep.

I grew up in a home without a TV, but loved basketball. I learned about the game at the library reading Sports Illustrated features and newspaper gamers and catching little bits of games on TV at my grandpa’s house.

“Coach, what do you have to say about gambling away your nephew to a drug cartel?”

Gregg Popovich is the best current coach in the NBA.

Just use whatever text to speech app Fox uses.

about as many as if connor cook did it: zero

THAT HAIL MARY PLAY I CALL IT THE DENTIST BECAUSE IT KILLED SOME LIONS FROM EXTREME LONG RANGE.

Browns fans wake up from three days of football-induced depression and think:

JESUS CHRIST STOP CHEWING ON IT! ARE YOU A FUCKING COW?

No. Not really. Thanks for asking though.

My 90-year old grandfather still goes to the gym five days a week. In his case, it’s inspiring and sweet because he’s trying to maintain whatever health he can. And he has no delusions about being a body builder or athlete.

“Oh yes,” he ejaculated.

That’s because I am a high school history teacher.

Nah. When these kids get into high school, their history teacher has to read 100 incoherent essays that have phrases like “Abraham Lincoln enraptured the Election of 1860.”

I mean, are we even sure McCown got hurt last night? That video could be old.

Prophetic

‘We’ aren’t policing anybody. The employer, however, is. With millions invested in a troubled, relapsing 23 year old alcoholic employee, that employer probably should have been monitoring his behavior—and insisting he get treatment—from the start. Note that 31 other employers chose NOT to hire Johnny Manziel, perhaps…

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