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Diabolik Returns
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Yo ho ho and a bottle of redeye!

Face it, one day every single one of us will be a skeleton. Except me. I refuse to die.

Little Diabolik once heard that on the radio and thought the singer's name was Norman Greenbum, provoking the sort of potentially dangerous hysterical laughing fit which only innocent little nippers have.

Thanks for that, will have to track this down.

That late? Dear god, it looks so, well, primitive.

And Deke Leonard, guitarist with Man and a number of other bands, passed away as well. Bad Grim Reaper. Bad. Bad.

Louise Brooks, surely one of the most beautiful women who ever breathed.

Considering how much money this has made over the New Year I wouldn't be too sad about it.

It is opening in a lot of English language territories as Journey To The West: Demon Chapter, so that may be an American distributor's decision.

Yep, except the ones that are Macrovisioned, and I can't find a way around that.

I remember the technical journalist Barry Fox writing about it in the mid-90s.

Get hit by a Hormel™ truck and that might be true.

I'm sure you've seen the hilarious This Film Is Dangerous, a safety film made by the Royal Navy in - I guess - the 30s, about the dangers of showing nitrate prints on ships. Very, very funny, and scary, I'm sure it's floating about the interwebs somewhere.

You are talking to someone who had to transfer a film from VHS in nine - count 'em - nine sections onto my DVR hard drive due to having to repeatedly withdraw the tape and clean the head it was shedding so much, then combine them onto a DVD in chapters. It's not because I'm mean or anything but the thing isn't

I'm not eating anywhere called 'Dat Dog'.

Still not put the McSlurry back on the menu?

With just a hint of cheese.

I have to say I have a nasty streak when I need it, and there are a couple of people who have hurt those close to me I know I would do very. very bad things to, but this is just heartbreaking for Patton and his poor daughter. I'm not his biggest fan by any means but this is just so deeply, deeply wrong.

Called News Movie in the UK. Cost me £1 in Cash Converters. Still haven't watched it, about three years later.