The La La has landed. ..

How about twenty-one feet?

There is an old phrase, 'No parent should have to buy their child's coffin'. I've always found that heartbreaking.

Only if you shoot his eyes out with it.

Sudan Boyle's new album has taken a terribly dark turn…

Brilliant.

Throats? How many you got?

And a headband saying 'Ninja', just so as you know.

Dolphin-piloted mechas. Pacific Rim 2 just wrote itself, didn't it.

'New animals discovered' No, that's not good, that's potentially terrifying.

I believe there was a band called I Am A Fugitive From A Chainsaw, which is a great name.

'….enthusiasm'.

Oh good, a new James Franco project every 21.47 days, as if 2017 wasn't going to be a big enough cauldron of shit….

There's that incredible movie about a Japanese monster rampaging through the cabaret clubs of 1930s Berlin, based on the novel I Am A Gamera.

Guaranteed to bring you down.

I read that as 'James Franco stars as Goatse', which will sear it's way into my nightmares forever more.

When's the porno coming - Beneath The Sheets - KKKXXX.

They are now the KKKardashians. It was purely a marketing decision.

And Lifetime. Huge viewership among the 35-56 fascist demographic.

Wow! We had en entire 24 hours without people trying to flog us shit. Back to normal…