The voice in my head that read your comment to me has totally nailed its Trump impression.

The Period Poem

So the entire time I’ve been looking at mine and thinking “Holy fuckballs, you could hang a goddamn coat on one of these things...,” I could have been comparing them to candy instead of hardware? Damn. Jujube solidarity, indeed.

Back in the day, when I wanted to try on a pair of breasts for size, I could never go wrong with these:

I'm going with less directorial restraint and more with Huvane black magic.

Nothing like walking in on something you know goes on, but really don't need to confirm for certain. (Kinda like pooping. Everyone poops. I just don't need a description or an open door.) However, the experience did prove to be a teachable moment for him. I suggested to him later that in the future, when he's whipped…

The He-Marm is 15 years older than me and grew up in a time where women were more, shall we say, subservient to their men. His mother waited on his father hand and foot, and all three of her sons, as well. He married a woman who continued to do the same for him and she either never expressed an interest in sharing…

"You didn't have to do that" and its optional addenda: "I was going to do it" and "I would have helped you" make my fucking eye twitch. When coupled with this passive/aggressive cherry: "Why didn't you remind me?" it's all I can do to keep from sprouting snakes out of my head and going full Gorgon.

Cosby says he did indeed give Lisa his "approval" to do Angel Heart, but he is quick to
add that he didn't go see it because "that film doesn't offer my appetite anything."

Don't you know that 16 will get you 20?? Keep your fucking hands off the fucking children.

So much gray area with "age of consent." From what I can reasonably gather, the state of PA allows for some room to maneuver.

Once was enough for me. Why buy the bull, when I can get the horn for free?

Fuck. I laughed way too loud at this...bag the polite snicker and straight to the honking bray. The cat perched judgmentally on the edge of the tub (I may or may not be in the library, why?) didn't appreciate my dulcet tones, and proceeded to fall off. That resulted in a mad scrabbling of cat claws, desperate to get…

Foo Foo is a little bunny hopping through the forest. Not a body part.

The sense of entitlement wafting off of this prick sandwich just boggles. Years ago, when I was in my very early 20's, I was a hostess at a restaurant that was more about the bar scene than the food. Players from the city's basketball and football teams, local "celebrities", etc., were the primary customer base. …

Well, fuck. Apparently I've been slowly circling the drain for 24 years. Is it too late to work on my facial attitude?

Well goddamn, don't people just love to play with their doo doo. Prudence "Don't Touch Me When You Put It In" McPrude would not be amused.

Harry is broody because his hair is full of secrets.

Had a friend who dated a guy years ago whose mother breast fed him until he was 4 years old. She called it "noonie" and he'd ask her for her it when he came in from playing outside or before he went to bed. Okay then.

Not that I can recall. But, I've been wrong before.