I thought the whole incentive of writing for the Internet is that pants are not necessary. Guess I am wrong. Unless the AV Club has a pant-less office.

Sweet, this guy who I literally never knew existed prior to reading this article just tied himself to that one douchey character with the bad rug. Now I shall forever associate him with that douchebag. I believe he accomplished his mission here, whatever the fuck that was.

Oh, I'm sure there will be a more detailed, spoiler-ific trailer down the road. I was merely responding to the notion that this teaser might have had "all the best parts," when it basically showed no parts of the film.

'The Grey''s marketing team completely botched that job. I didn't watch it for over a year because I figured it was like that Anthony Hopkins bear movie, then I finally watched it and was shocked by how moody and relentless it was in its doom/gloom. I would have seen it far sooner had I know that it was actually a…

Offer enough free tickets in the middle of February and one of those movies is bound to be OK. I'm guessing that one of the triumvirate of Non-Stop/Pompeii/3 Days to Kill will earn surprisingly high reviews. My bet is that it will be either 'Pompeii' (over-the-top B-movie madness) or 'Non-Stop' (Liam Neeson vehicles…

I think that's a fair enough target.

There's a 0% chance it's an 'Avengers'-sized hit. 'The Avengers' had the cross-over appeal of a bunch of different preexisting franchises that had already made barrels of money. This has a raccoon.

As somebody who is not hip to this film, I don't think they showed much at all. I have no clue what the plot of this movie is after watching that.

Ice dancing may or may not be a sport, but when I touch ice with my feet, I generally fall over immediately, so I'm impressed that humans can twizzle on that surface.

I already took a jab at the free '3 Days to Kill' tickets, but I will not be doing so with the 'Pompeii' ones, as I know that I am going to be watching this movie in various states of inebriation throughout my life.

This broaches an existential question about the unseen cost of this allegedly "free" experience. Is a free ticket to a most likely awful Kevin Costner movie enough to get people out of bed, dressed and out the door into the wintry Chicago night? Only time will tell. Time, which 'True Detective' tells me is actually…

Plays into what they've been talking about all season with the "Detective's Curse." The case is right in front of you and you don't realize it.

I was 100% positive that as they were pulling out past the window, the last shot would be of somebody watching Rust. I was 0% correct, but I think it just goes to show how unnerving this show is. Such an exercise in sustained tension and creepiness.

Originality not forefront of human using stylistic gimmick.

But I don't really think he's getting much hate. Mostly, people are just rolling their eyes and making jokes about Drake, which was already a national pastime. I don't think anybody REALLY cares about this. For me, it's just something to pass the time with until we find something else to pile on.

Humanity does suck, I agree.

OK, but look at the flip-side. Living, breathing, rich, famous human Drake is complaining about the fact that he didn't get on the cover of a magazine that he's been on the cover of before and will be again. Drake bitched about something that makes him look like a selfish, self-absorbed, reactionary crazy person.

Well, he had two options here, really. Option One: Learn that Rolling Stone is making a cover change because a talented actor passed away, accept it with maturity and understanding. Option Two: Go on Twitter and type the first 140 characters that your outraged fingers can hit.

Props to his media guy for writing a more authentic apology than most of the other media guys.

When Bob Dylan perishes, I will lock myself away from society for a week. Dylan's music mattered to me more than almost anything in my life for a stretch of four years because really sad life events blah blah blah. I have a personal connection with his music that I'll never have with another act in my life. While I…