Juan Uribe is definitely going to have a hard time with this, since he’s not on the Mets anymore.

Hey, this comment is out of bounds!

This is wrong. The correct answer is 1 part rolled oats, 1 part whole milk, 1 part water, dash of salt, cook in a small/medium pot on the stove, stirring however frequently and for however long you want.

Maybe we shouldn’t be surprised that Purdue froze down the stretch, that 12 was chicken, his brain fried by the moment. I’m sure the press will roast the coach for his half-baked strategy, but don’t forget the players, they’re probably feeling pretty tender this morning.

My favorite detail? The paper shredder.

Well, for now they do. Give it enough time...

I’m just glad baseball is becoming more open and accepting, where a dude and his male friends can joyfully sock dingers whenever they want.

Can someone post a feelgood baseball story for me? Between this and the Mets cutting Tiny Tim Ruben Tejada, this is sort of a bummer day.

As it so happens, age-graded scoring exists, so we can pretty much quantify what it means to be “good.” I’d say that 60%, the threshold for “local class” would be good, i.e. better than “average.”

I don’t know about being a good runner, but pretty much anyone can be a runner. A few random thoughts:

Watching this asshat come right up to the line of being openly racist is like watching someone holding back a sneeze.

Makes me wonder: who died from dabbing?

Ha! I already had no problems scoring.

Regarding kids and not being able to do what you want, yes, just wait. Then you can have a special outing with your oldest wherein you try to do something you used to enjoy and he makes it systematically unfun. Hurray!

Pshaw! Hit .400 just for $100 million? Shin-soo Choo laughs in the face of your idiocy! He can hit .260 for Texas and make $140 million.

Looks like Gruden would fail any number of teams’ draft interview.

Will the moat keep out smallpox?

So that’s what SNL’s Chris Parnell is up to these days.

So let’s be clear, Marlins. To enhance your at-bat, to get peak performance, you need to get right up on the plate and try to cream it. Steroids.

“Same number of touchdowns and interceptions? I’ll drink an ice cold King of Beers to that!”—2015 Peyton Manning.