Smuckers is on some bullshit if they think I'm paying $1.10 more for their fucking "select" preserves. Like Ina Garten picked the strawberries from her dew-covered garden instead of some poor Honduran fellow in crushing 90 degree heat. These Smuckers people are fucked.

Hannah and her Sisters is not obscure!!

I hear he has also called Harrison Ford and Kelly McGillis to testify.

Buzz, you never answered my question from the previous live chat: Do you think the Dead turned into a second rate country band after Pigpen died? What would Buddy Holly have done had he lived? Do these questions keep you up at night?

My wife took me to Levon's house for one of the Midnight Rambles for my 30th birthday. Levon is a ferociously heroic artist. Christ that is sad.

Deadspin expects so much more out of its commenters than the Washington Post does out of Bob Woodward.

Ha! Commenting! Who can figure this shit out?!

By "secretary" you mean the beautiful antique oak roll top desk you bought in colonial Williamsburg, right?

What have I missed? Anybody say anything funny on here?

Jayne was the daughter of Dwight Eisenhower and Mae West.

I am so sick of Kris Joseph carrying himself like he is Glen Robinson or some huge star. Fucking take the ball to the rim and take more than four shots. Christ.

James Dean was Zac Efron. Jerry Garcia was Mozart and Walt Whitman with a heroin problem. Totally different.

Fuck fuck fuck. They are going to lose to Purdue or Virginia or Iowa St. in the second round. I can feel it and I want to puke.

I felt this way after I got an email from NBC trying to get me to buy 6,000 martini glasses after they cancelled The Playboy Club.

After exposing underage girls to his olive oil voice and guinea charm, Cordes is not allowed within 100 yards of a youth sporting event.

+1

I haven't seen the bottom fall out of something so quickly since that time I went to a wedding in Tel Aviv during Ramadan.

+1

DVRing it. Full of great theater folk like Cherry Jones. I love me some Cherry Jones.

You are speaking about yourself in the third person? You are blurring the line between commenter and Candace Parker's Secret Lover.