My son is so white his legs are as blue as his eyes. That said- we are not white, and neither is my son.

My desperate need for them to hurry is tempered by our need for them to make it all airtight.

Sure. Yep.

Jon Bon Jovi is from Cheesequake. For real.

I was having a bad day, so knowing I cheered up your bad morning makes me very happy. Thank you for picturing it. Because after I tried to eat it I do. Deer at the buffet.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Not bothering to scroll down yet- but almost any white man who has to address this person as, “Sir Carter,” is going to flinch. That is awesome.

No no no you go into Golden Corral at lunchtime when you’ll be surrounded by 40 year old construction workers who only want to shovel calories into their faces for cheap so they can get back to work.

Yertle looks like that in pretty much anything he puts on — that’s just his soul sticking out.

Am from NC. Completely agree.

That was beautiful.

Bless his heart.

http://www.wral.com/wake-forest-student-seen-in-fight-claimed-to-be-victim-of-racial-bullying/16570052/

UGH THIS GUY

This administration would rather fuck themselves with four cactuses than work for reparations.

That is fantastic.

Millepied???????????

1: They never saw combat.