Do you actually talk like that?

I’ve never seen a child complain about how much candy they’re given. Sounds like you just live in a rude-ass area.

Last year one of the houses in my neighborhood gave out mini containers of playdoh. Great way to have every kid love you and every parent hate you.

The bathroom at my doctor’s office has a sign inside the stall about what to do if you’re being abused. I thought that was really smart.

I found out a friend of mine had ALS right around the time the ice bucket challenge became a thing. He was always sharing ice bucket challenge videos and saying that he loved seeing people spread the word about a disease that was hardly ever talked about.

I had never heard about ALS until the ice bucket challange. I had heard of Lou Gehrig’s Disease but I didn’t know what it was or that it was the same as ALS. Just because you’re aware of something doesn’t mean everyone else is.

Yeah, same here. I can suspend logic to get into a movie, but don’t create a world where everything is the same except a creepy murder doll and THEN throw in that hands can come out of paintings too.

Why wasn’t the doll donated or thrown away if you didn’t want it anymore?

Yeah I didn’t really get what the big deal was about this viral picture. So a granddaughter isn’t a terrible person and also happens to be a paramedic.

So soon after a break up I think it’s fine. If it’s like a year later though, I’d have some reservations.

No, it is not ethical. Yes, I did it anyway. I NEEDED a pea coat and you can’t say no to $14.92 off a $50 purchase.

I know. I was just correcting the person who said that it wasn’t mentioned at all.

I didn’t consider that it could’ve been between two of the girls. And obviously you and I wouldn’t call rape “weird sex stuff”, but the girls might, considering how they were educated in the bunker.

They actually do talk about it in Kimmy Schmidt. Someone wants to ask her a question and she says “Yes, there was weird sex stuff”, assuming that that’s what they were going to ask. You could say that weird sex stuff doesn’t necessarily mean rape, but in her scenario I think we can assume it was.

Oh my gosh, totally. I feel like those mom groups are the reason Walmart sells “Daddy’s little princess” and “Mommy’s big strong guy” onesies.

Yeah the Mommyish stuff she does just seems...watered down? I don’t know, but it definitely doesn’t make me laugh out loud like the original blog did.

I’ll try.

No, I haven’t.

I mean, it’s one thing to have that angry inner monologue when you get cut off on the freeway because “FUCKING _____ DRIVERS”. Yeah, we all do that shit.

Excellent piece, I just wish it would’ve been longer.